The Time I Rolled With The Big Boys

I was 16 years old and fresh out of my first year out of secondary school. Summer had finally arrived and I wanted to be productive. I wasn't going to sit around all day doing nothing like most of the other people I knew. I was going to go out there and mingle with the big boys, the game changers, the guys that had a purpose and pronoucend "yeah" like "yah" and went to sushi bars for lunch rather than super drugs, as I had been doing all of my part-time working life.

Through my limited connections I had secured a placement at what is now a top trading company, I was out of my sleepy town where the most exciting thing to happen was when a neighbours newspaper wasn't delivered, to the city, where I belonged, where money was made (and lost) at an astounding rate and where bringing your A game was an expectation rather than a bonus. My attire; school shoes, accompanied by an over sized shirt and blazer. I looked like I had been swallowed by a suit.

Well having worked with the "big boys" for a week, I was invited along to birthday gathering with some of the lads. It all seemed like a professional affair with alcoholic drinks that I was encouraged to consume (I was definitely underage) and endless banter. All harmless fun, but it all changed when the clocks struck midnight, It was Jekyll and Hyde esq.  It was at the precise moment when I was ready to call it a night that I felt a smooth yet firm hand grab me around my neck and tell me the party had just begun (this lad definitely wasn't afraid of a manicure).

I was ushered into a building with only a neon light above the doorway and a bouncer the size of frankenstien standing guard. What the heck is he guarding I wondered as someone stuffed £20 into his pocket as I was bundled inside the "club". After stumbling my way through the entrance and immediately falling up some stairs in my Barrets shoes.  I slowly raised my head to see what I can only imagine T-pain saw when he wrote his infamous song. God was a long way away from this place. This was the devils playground and damn did the devil know how to party.

I looked to my left, it looked like a scene from coco cabana, "B...B..Brazilians," I mutter having only seen figures like theirs on MTV Base.  I look to my right and it looks as though I had just landed in Warsaw, tall beach blonde girls gesturing with the finger. You know that finger that you only see in dirty movies that is frequently accompanied by a wink. I turned around to see no-one behind me, then looked back at her and pointed at myself confused...was she gesturing me!? "She was talking to me!" I exclaim, The "big boys" burst out laughing. What is this place?! I look directly ahead and it felt like I was in Bangkok, girls flying up and down the pole with an athletic prowess that gymnasts in Cirque du Solei would be proud off. Every nationality you could imagine was in there and only the finest specimens at that.

As time ticked on, the "big boys" disappeared one after another, where they went...ask no questions and you'll hear no lies.  I on the other hand fell in love with a stripper, her name escapes me, but I could draw her with my left hand, thats how well I remember her and her many talents. Also because of her I learnt my first and only piece of portugese..."Cerveja".

I secretly support Brazil as a result.

Now being as broke as I was I just sat in amazement until surprisingly someone stuffed a wad of cash in my pocket and said go on, whilst slapping me on my back and giving me a Wah hey and a wink of encouragement. What happened in the next 4 minutes can only be described as a glorious experience (no it wasn't that! get your head out of the gutter). So this is what the "big boys" got up to, I muttered to myself...I wanted in.

I must say though, thank you mr anonymous for that wad, it paid for my taxi and Sushi lunches for the whole of the next week! Finally, I was one of the big boys.